Archive for the ‘Captain Save-A-Ho is Off Duty’ Category

Friday Freaky Tales

February 12, 2009

Same freak, new spot. But I’m sayin’, its always fun to find new spots. Its been awhile so I know I should ply you with sweet talk, beg your forgiveness for leaving you so abruptly,  but lets skip the niceties and just get right down to it, like I showed up at your door buck nekkid under a trench coat with a bottle of Henny in one hand and handcuffs in the other. I know how you like it baby. (more…)


One time for the hos

November 15, 2007


Unless you have been living under a rock, boycott consumerism or are fortunate enough to reside in a country that doesn’t begin preparing to celebrate the capitalistic holiday season in September, you are well aware that Christmas is indeed coming.


Make It Rain

October 22, 2007



There is a movement afoot, one that can only be traced back to the war on Hip Hop. It’s a subwar of sorts. A war on one of Hip Hop’s favorite pastimes. No, not gun collecting. Stripping. Strippers are under attack.  In Atlanta, the city government is practicing nothing short of ageism, decreeing that all clubs that serve alcohol cannot hire workers under 21. In St. Maarten, health officials are accusing a stripper of spreading tuberculosis to over 40 people.


Everybody Get Freaky!

October 21, 2007



I was listening to the radio this weekend and I noted there were an inordinate amount of pro-abstinence commercials. Not that I’m anti-abstinence per se, but I must admit that this trend of abstinence only sex education is rather disheartening because it seems to miss the target. Commercials ending “I wish I waited” miss the mark. Why? Because people ARENT waiting.


Killer Kids = Hip Hop??

October 14, 2007


When the kid in the picture above is a teenager who listens exclusively to Marilyn Manson, dresses like a vampire reject, hates people and shots up his school before ending his own sad, miserable, self involved life, please believe it’ll be 50 cents fault. Or maybe at that point, it’ll be Marquise’s fault.


News You May Have Missed

October 11, 2007


Kids killing kids, newfangled technology— its been quite a week.


Rap for Dummies

October 9, 2007


Since A&R and Artist Development budgets have been cut like healthcare and every one and their uncle’s baby momma wants to be a rapper, we here at Southern Comfort have decided to put together a nifty Idiots Guide to a Successful Rap Career, detailing a few of the less obvious rules (misspell as often as possible using a “z” any chance you get, pick the most retarded ass stage name you can think of, make it an acronym for something outrageous if you can, etc.)

Follow at your own risk. And if you blow up, I expect mad residuals. Crazy mad.


Courting is Dead

August 29, 2007



That makes me sad.


Get Low

August 27, 2007


Critics are crying a foul threatening to get the ACLU in involved due to the multitude of “anti-saggy pant” laws that are making their way onto the books across these United States. Already outlawed in parts of Louisiana, Dallas and Atlanta are now trying to equate saggy pants and visible drawers to public sex acts (heartless lawmakers… taking all the fun out of public sex), effectively squelching an individual’s freedom of bad fashion.


Use Me Up

August 15, 2007



Romance has died. To court refers to showing up while your boo cops a plea. Nice guys are finishing last and women are trying to “masculinize” our habits and erase emotions. We’re not making love: we’re fucking for free.