Sniff this

 

A note: Southern Comfort frowns on censorship, but the following post is definitely for the grown ups.

It is only fitting that SC’s resident Vagina Scientist brought this to my attention- a German developed perfume of sorts called Vulva. As you can tell, Germans are pros at subtlety.

I say of sorts because their website (which you should by no means peruse at work in the interest of keeping your job) specifically states that “Vulva Original is not a perfume. It is a beguiling vaginal scent which is a purely a substance for your own smelling pleasure.” It was only a matter of time, I suppose, seeing as Saturday Night Live has already given the world Dick in a Box. It’s only fair that there now exists Pussy in a Bottle.

You probably need a moment right now. Either to laugh, order a bottle or pray.

While the fact that there is a personal scent experience smelling like punanny on the market s odd enough… it gets even more disturbing to learn that the company is developing two additional vaginal scents “Eighteen” (Despite the just legal number, this just screams pedophile. Or R. Kelly) and “Exotic” (which could mean either Coconut & Jasmine or Asian Sex Slave).

I know folks, you need another moment.

As further advertisement, the site offers you a slightly soft core porn commercial (also known as the commercial Puff desperately wants to make) featuring some lesbionic love while the sole man in the clip seemingly prefers to sniff the back of his hand, scented with his bottle of Vulva rather than “Suge Knight” the models.

What can I say… I promised debauchery. Go on, take another moment.